Kindles and Cars

My kindle was grabbed out of my hands on our bus ride back from Mt. Kenya. If I had been sitting just one seat over, if the window had been just closed a fraction more, or if I had chosen to read my stolen library book instead (I'm technically the librarian, so I don't know if taking books out of the library is really stealing), my Kindle would still be in my possession. But no. I'm not that smart. 

Nothing good has ever happend on that particular street in Nairobi. It was on that street that Taylor almost had her ipod stolen, Tanzi's speakers were ruined, perpetual traffic, the SMs almost got arrested, and now my kindle to boot. When the man jumped up to take it, I was so startled to be pulled from the midst of the Tower of Bable, that I couldn't fight him or grab onto the device fast enough. While my thumb did get a minor scratch on it, I was unhurt in the process. 

After the initial shock wore off, I had time to really think. The thing that made me the most upset, and the reason I cried, was not the fact that the Kindle was gone, but that with one motion, that man had ripped so many memories from my hand. As I sat contemplating what I had just lost, the first thing that flew into my head was my copy of the Conflict of the Ages series which I had just been reading. With each book costing a mere dollar, every file backed up on my Amazon account, and with numerous physical copies at my disposal in Maxwell's library, it was only my notes and highlights that were lost. Thinking of those five books made me think of my Dad and the times he came into my room to play with my new gadget, buy me good books, and to just sit, just because. 

The scratch on my thumb happened when I tried to grab the kindle cover in the split second I knew what was happening. That cover made me think of my brother. He's the one who had originally bought me the Kindle. I had been thinking about getting one for my year in Kenya, but then my little brother surprised me with a very early birthday present a few weeks before I left. It was with him that I searched the shelves of Walmart for a cover, and it was with him that I stumbled upon the perfect one. I had seen it earlier; a nice, simple, black cover that snapped on all the way around my Kindle, holding it snugly in place. The only problem was the price. I had decided to forget about it until we stopped by a Target in Atlanta on the way to the airport. We were on a duel mission of killing time and finding headphones. It was there in the back of the electronics section that I saw the Kindle case I wanted, not just on sale, but on clearance. Turns out Kindles aren't all that popular in that part of Atlanta. Finding that case was an experience I'll always remember; my brother and I with our incredibly white skin were more out of place in that Target than I've ever felt living here in Kenya. 

Melissa offered me her cell phone so I could call home and tell my parents about my loss. While we were still stuck in Nairobi traffic, there was no hope of getting any internet access to disconnect my Kindle from my Amazon account (just in case the bandits wanted to buy a new book at my expense). It was great to talk to my mom, and my Dad worked everything out with my Amazon account, but I did learn some news about my car. Turns out my brother had been in a pretty major accident the day before while driving my car. Thankfully, no one was hurt, but there is a possibility my car could be totaled. 

While I love both my car and my Kindle, they are both just things. Possessions that pale in comparison to the relationships they point to. My Kindle reminded me of my brother. It reminded me of my dad and how he loves to give good gifts; my car was that way too. My dad once told a friend of mine, "Don't cry about things that money can replace. You can always buy another one." He was right. When I think about what I lost today, I really didn't lose anything important. I still have the memories, I still have the relationships, and I still have the love, and that's what really matters. 

Mt Kenya, Camp, and Mistakes

Recently, my mind has been stuck on decisions. And not just any decisions. Big ones. Or at least decisions that seem to be looming large on the horizon at the moment. I've been thinking and processing, but I've not been coming up with many answers.

Do I really want to climb Mt. Kenya with the school next week? I already skipped the last prep hike. I'm pretty sure I'm crazy... Spending my last three sundays hiking for a trip that now I'm not planning on taking. And maybe I am crazy, but maybe I'm not as crazy as I seem. Is life really about the destination? There's something to be said about goals and working towards them, but there's also something to be said about the journey, the climb itself. Whether or not I end up hiking to the top of Mt. Kenya this week, and regardless of how high I get on that mountain in my lifetime, I know that climbing Mt Longonot was not a waste. And even if I never use the training I received on the Ngong hills, I know I still made it to the top. Twice. And that is enough.

Do I really want to work at a brand new summer camp? Do I really want to spend my summer making (or possibly not making) new friends who I might never see again? Do I really want to learn a whole new camp system full of new rules and different expectations? Do I really want to find another option? It's one thing to sit comfortably behind your tumblr account re-blogging well designed inspirational quotes, but it's a completely different thing to actually reply to the email sitting patiently in your inbox. To take a step forward into the unknown. So, here I am. Googling flights to California.

I may not make the smartest decisions, and I have my fair share of regrets, but even in the mistakes and wrong turns there are lessons and joys. Who says that life is all about the destination or the major milestones along the way. The best moments rarely occur at major intersections, because of incredible decision making skills, or when we feel the safest. The best moments come about because of decisions that are made on shaky ground, when you hold your breath as you step out into uncertainty. It's those decisions that lead people to take last minute trips to foreign countries, give up once in a lifetime opportunities, and fly across the country on a single recommendation. I'm still scared stiff as I look at the decisions looming before me, but I'm still moving forward and that's the exciting part.

A Valentines Miracle

While the rest of the world was probably snuggling up to their sweethearts or wallowing in self-pity, here in Kenya we were celebrating! 

First of all, after nearly seven months of waiting, we finally have a brand new, shiny, working washer In. Our. House! Oh happy day! 

Our brand new working washer!

The kids here at Maxwell really get into Valentines day! I mean seriously get into the holiday! All day long, the girls were running around with lipstick tubes in various unapproved colors, painting their hands with it and plastering everyones faces with it. These "kisses" may not have been real, but some of them turned out pretty realistic! While some of the other SMs were trying to avoid these kisses, I was enjoying myself. These kids are crazy, and despite the lectures I've been giving them recently on manners and appropriate behavior, I really do love them. 

Wherever you found yourself yesterday, I hope you had a fantastic heart day, found many wonderful surprises, and where surrounded by those you love. Happy Valentines Day! 

  

The Bandwagon

Sometimes it takes me so long to jump on the bandwagon. Sometimes it’s because I just can’t find where it is, but there are other times when I know exactly what I should be doing, but yet I wait. I don’t know why I wait so long; with friends, my classes, my spiritual life. It’s February, and today was the first day where I gave the freshmen homework to work on in class and I still felt like a competent, in control teacher by the end of the class period. It was incredible feeling knowing that they were learning, and that I was still in control of my classroom. I’m pretty sure I know what made the difference too. Right before class, Jacqui told me that the freshmen girls had asked her to do things the way I do them. I was stunned. Since when was I any sort of example for classroom management? (Remember?)

Things definitely have been changing. Just last week I gave the freshmen a seating chart, and you would have thought I was passing out death sentences instead of seat assignments. Immediately the asking to switch started. For the first time, I didn’t cave in and I made them sit in their assigned seats and told them that I would be out on supervision in the afternoon, and if they had a major problem with their seat, we could address it together then. No one came and talked to me. I knew I had given those with legitimate concerns the opportunity they needed to talk to me, and I had stayed firm at the same time. After the first few days of pulling teeth to get students to sit in assigned seats, I really haven’t had as many problems, and definitely fewer than I’ve had in the beginning of the year.

I've finally come to the point where I don't even think twice about copying someone else's discipline techniques, and I've heard myself, on more than one occasion, repeating another teacher's sentence verbatim. I've had these teachers around me for six months now, so why has it taken me this long to even start getting my act together?

So back to that bandwagon. What took me so long to climb on board? Was there any hope of me figuring all this out earlier? Do people really have being an SM down to a science? Are there really phases that you go through, and I'm just finally at the listening phase? I really don't know, but regardless of what is making the difference, I'm glad that change is coming.

I'm so incredibly grateful I serve a patient God.